i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Randomize