And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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