Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
