my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
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