i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
