They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
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