I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Randomize
