there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
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