this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
