She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Randomize
