we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
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