Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
