David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
