haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Randomize
