i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
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