But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
Randomize
