There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
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