At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
We are all done wearing pants today
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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