This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
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