names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
