I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
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