how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
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