Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I CAN MOONWALK!
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
