I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
