YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
