It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
