The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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