Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
It's shark week go big or go home
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
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