i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
