OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
Randomize
