Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
