so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Randomize
