I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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