It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
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