I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
