is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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