did you get engaged???
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
