There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
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