Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
So much Jack, so little girl.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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