It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Randomize
