i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Rumble strips road head = magical
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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