I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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