Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Randomize
