she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
it's like iHOP with fire
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
