garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
