Just mADE A PArabola og urine
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
