Bisexual people are plain selfish.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
