Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
