it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
The air was thick with penises
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
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