She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
Randomize
