So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Randomize
